Self confessions.....

For some reason I've been feeling quite down for the past couple of weeks. It's kind of a vicious circle i've got going - get up, go to work, spend the day desperate to play and practise my golf (but I can't because either the weather is shite or I can't get cover), get home, lie on my bed for about an hour, go for a swim, then work my way through a couple of beers, then get the hump with myself for getting on the beers again.
It all stems from winter boredom and my intense desire to have some decent weather etc so I can start working on my golf again. I guess I'm just getting ultra-impatient now! Still, only 8 days now 'til the days start getting longer again.
I've gotten myself into a bit of a habit with beer (I say 'beer' and not 'alcohol' generally!) which to be honest has lasted quite a long time. I am fully aware of all the connatations of this:

- I am soon hoping to become a professional sportsman and a vice like this isn't the most suitable,
- It is a very high contributing factor to why I'm currently more than a stone overweight,
- Its not good for long term health.

There are more I'm sure but I won't list them. I guess its the same with chocolate and junk food etc - we know these things arent good for us but they do provide a source of comfort. 'Comfort from what?', you might say!! In my case I don't really know, but I do know that a drop of the old ale works very well at chilling me out at the end of the day. Is this such a terrible thing as I seem to be being made to feel by a very substantial hipocrite(!). Surely many blokes live their life in this way - although possibly to a lesser degree!!!

It's quite a funny irony, however, because whenever I go on a night out, I am usually the first one to hit the bottles of water and I also hate being really drunk, not to mention hungover!

So, to address the above mentioned connatations: I am even more aware and in full acknowledgement of each point and totally plan on addressing this in the new year. This is perhaps my most important resolution for the new year - cut out the booze (at least during the week!!!). I'm only 22 years old and certainly don't think of this as a big problem to address - it's just sometimes tough to break a habit, ANY habit.
I don't think there would be much point addressing this right now as christmas is just around the corner and unfortunately I think it'll take quite a lot of commitment and motivation to learn to avoid the stop at the 'Offy' for a crafty tin - not something thats easy around the festive period for anyone!! I have a vivid plan in mind for January onwards that is going to take real self-discipline (something I obviously struggle with). If I can keep the long term goal in mind and keep re-iterating the fact that it'll be worth it in the end then hopefully this'll keep me going.

Dont get me wrong anyone - this certainly isnt a cry for help. Just a bit of self-admittance that I've got to get my act together a bit in certain ways.

Till next time......