Recovery......

Well I have started to come to terms with Mondays ordeal. Mentally I have certainly accepted the failure and am looking to move forward, but bizarrely i'm still a physical mess which is now kind of beginning to freak me out. I've had a zero appetite and nausea for 2 days now and my body just cant seem to get over the whole experience. I'm not trying to put anyone off this obviously - just being honest about what I am going through.

Its strange though because mentally I feel great. Ive booked another test for July 4th, have fully taken on board everything I learned monday and have ironed out a swing fault that also plagued me monday with my pitching. These things have given me confidence. I am comforted by the fact that even if i get nervous again, it can in no way be to the degree that is was on Monday and although I failed, I did hit a lot of quality shots under the pressure I was feeling, particularly with my driver which is the club I have struggled with greatly in recent times. I was intrigued by this actually because Monday was the best Ive hit my driver for months! It was just anything else that I struggled with!

I also holed a lot of great putts too which has increased my confidence in that area too. The problem I had aside from the nerves was racking up 4 or 5 big numbers each round which does not help with the confidence factor. Silly errors, bad bounces and compounding other errors were my problem. I simply incurred too many penalty shots. All these things now are really spurring me on because I know I have to do next time. I will also have a wise head on the bag from a guy at work who used to caddy for a living and this will aid my fluctuating temper. Added to that my boss N is striking up a partnership with a sports hypnotherapist/psychologist who wants to help me with my preparation for the next test and show me some techniques to help me relax and focus. I cant wait for this, as it is an area I have been looking to develop for a very long time!

I finish college next week and I am very exited about that too! The last 2 months have been a struggle because of work but I feel I have well and truly earned my qualification and cant wait to receive it and confirm it on my CV. It will also be a great relief for me to get this course off my back and behind so I can concentrate on my career because I will then be able to dedicate myself to it whole-heartedly with nothing else to worry about. My lady R has got herself a great new job too so things are indeed looking up.

N and A brought little baby Max home this week and he is settling in great. They are such proud parents and it is amazing that they can now live with the dream they've had for 9 months.

Thus, despite the somewhat negative opening to this blog, I am in a very positive and optimistic mood. Bring on the next test!!!!!!!